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Terror Squadron Ship Club Charter

In the Terror Squadron we don’t have time for a lot of rules and hell, we wouldn’t want them even if we did have the time! But men are going to be men and after one of our boys killed a very dangerous man’s dog (a long story I’ll tell you later), the First 9 decided we had to come up with a few rules that keep us…civilized. In no good order, and now that I look at them, out of order:

1/10 NO BIKE NO VOTE

You don’t got the clams for your own bike (Dragonfly, Nox, Ranger, etc.), then you don’t got the respect needed to vote within the Squadron. In fact, you find yourself without a bike , you better remedy that situation fast…real fast. NUFF SAID!

2/10 NEVER LEAVE A SQUADRON BROTHER OR SISTER BEHIND, EVER

Yea our business dealings or extracurricular “activities” can on occasion, get us into less than desirable situations. Leaving a living brother or sister behind in one of these “sticky” situations will get you kicked out of the Club at best, and with a bullet in your head at worst. If you do find yourself in this situation, my recommendation is that you leave the system and don’t look back. NUFF SAID!

4/10 NO SNITCHES!

Snitches get stiches. NUFF SAID!

3/10 RESPECT THE AUTHORITY OF YOUR CHARTER ELDERS

There are three types of people you need to respect in this universe. Your Momma and your old man if he’s still around, the First 9, and your local charter superiors. If you’ve got a problem with a superior you take it to the local charter President, and if your beef is with the President, then you take it to the First 9. Be warned, the First 9 don’t have time for chicken shit regional disputes. NUFF SAID!

8/10 DO WHAT THE FUCK THE FIRST 9 SAY

You want to know why the First 9 get to be the big bosses? Go read the History section, which you should have done you jackass! Just kidding, we get that some of our folks lack in the brains department! Bottom line is that every charter is given pretty much full control of their territory to kick ass, party hard and make us all rich. Truth be told, the First 9 really don’t give a flying fuck what your charter does as long as it represents The Terror Squadron Ship Club with distinction, follows our basic rules and answers the call of brothers and sisters in need. NUFF SAID!

7/10 LOYALTY TO THE SQUADRON COMES FIRST

I get it, I get it! We all come from different backgrounds and some of us are not so keen on letting others know that we are part of this prestigious club of honorable, upstanding individuals! HA! Whether your fully dedicated to the club helping make runs from Jumptown, or you are an affiliate (redacted, etc.) that we don’t see quite as often, the bottom line is that there will be rare occasions when your charter and maybe the entire Club will call on you and your talents. And we better see you at Captain Blinky’s infamous annual orgy! NUFF SAID!

5/10 RESPECT CHARTER TERRITORIES

Do onto other charters as you want them doing to your charter fucker! If you have business in another charter’s territory, make sure they know. NUFF SAID!

6/10 YOU TALK IN PRISON YOU ARE A DEAD MAN

Sometimes the best (worst) plans go bad or we just drink a little too much and do something stupid. You end up in prison, you don’t talk about Club business. Follow this rule and you may find yourself being eligible for Club sponsored “early parole”! NUFF SAID!

9/10 CLUB DECISIONS APPLY TO EVERYONE, EVEN THE FIRST 9

Sometimes a decision is made above your head that you don’t like. Tough titties said Fat Lou! Let it be known that sometimes these rules even effect The First 9. Nobody is immune to the rules, not even the founders. NUFF SAID!

10/10 NO PIRACY BUT KILLING FOR REVENGE IS ACCEPTABLE

A few years back a busy bee of a man decided to start telling everyone that the Terror Squadron Ship Club was a pirate organization with bad intentions. HA! As you can imagine, this guy was a total piece of space trash, and like all trash, wound up taking being jettisoned from an airlock. Needless to say, we learned a valuable lesson about keeping our…questionable…activities out of the public eye. I’m not saying we do anything illegal, but people might jump to conclusions. The obvious thing the Club does NOT NOT NOT condone is proactive piracy. If someone gets in the way of your charter’s business ventures or decided to pick a fight with you, then by all means make them regret that decision. Bottom line is don’t start it, but be sure to finish it! NUFF SAID!!

- FAT LOU